Parental Guidance or Decision?

Thursday, 19 September 2013


Hey lovelies

I'm trying to redeem my image and blog frequently like before so please bear with me.

It's no news to anyone that parents often coerce their children into doing (studying) things they do not want to.
Then they sometimes end up confusing them.
It's fine for parents to 'guide and support' their children in what they want to do and provide appropriate advice. But they often do not see the wonders a child can perform in their chosen field, rather they just look forward saying Drs, Lawyers, Engineers always hit it big so they must be in that line.


I was in boarding school for a bit and every morning, the house matron said 'I want you all to be like Okonjo-Iweala'. Who wants to hear that every morning when we are meant to be praying but hey I still appreciate the fact till date that she set a goal for us and we are by His grace working towards that, minus the headgear.


Years ago, a friend of mine spoke about what her mother wanted her to do and that hit me hard. She said with emphasis that 'momsy wants me to be a blah blah bla'. I didn't want to start going into too much detail but I just listened and encouraged her. She's a graduate now and I still wonder if she is really happy in that line.

I also heard a story about a guy who studied medicine just because his parents insisted. This young man finished med school and framed his certificate and gave it to his father. He picked up his paint brush, pencils and whatever is used for art and ran with it.

Is there anyone that can tell his or her parents that after high school, I want to become a singer (meaning no more school) and they'll say okay darling, that's fine. Some might but certainly some will say the child is high on helium. Instead they'll hire extra tutors for their kids when they just are not interested in a subject, they believe they aren't 'pulling their weight'. This makes school drag and just a phase for them rather than an interesting time.


The movie Good deeds, Wesley Deeds wanted to be a biker but his father did not approve of that so he had to stick with the goal of taking over his father's business. He later gave up and followed his passion.

When an individual is stuck doing something they do not want to do, they end up ageing quick (I think), being grumpy, struggling and finding every work day stressful and unbearable.

It does work out for some and not so well for others.

When an individual does something he or she is interested in, it becomes second nature and work is not 'stressful' because you enjoy what you do.
Whatever you want to do, always have an insight that you can be the best. Be it an artist, a model, an architect, a poet, a writer, a politician, a manager, a doctor, a nurse/nurse consultant, a radiographer....whatever.

But if you prefer what your parents want you to study/do, then also put your heart to it and you can be the best at it - most importantly follow your heart and rely on God for direction.



  1. Been there.... started with medicine but later switched to Mass Comm. It was one of the most trying times in my life!

    1. For real? I can imagine. Sadly a lot of people are still going through the same thing.

  2. Yes very true and we can only rely on God's direction
    We know they mean the best for us but yeah it could be over done at times but let's always believe in ourselves and rely on God too he will always direct our path to greatness IJN

    1. Thank you anonymous for agreeing. Amen to the prayer, His direction is very important.

  3. Just stumbled onto ur blog and I love it.
    D issues are real.
    My younger sister's friend's mother told her they don't have art students in their family and she better start attending science class ryt now.this is to a girl that sucks at science.I pray parents stop dis stuff,it creats problems for the kids later on in life.

  4. Thank you Frances - I really hope they get to realise and stop enforcing their own tradition and opinions to that extent.


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